The Shotgun Blog
Monday, September 29, 2008
Heather Mallick has no clue about Canada
Looking over Heather Mallick's website, I found this preface to her listing of CBC columns:
"Each Monday a fresh piece of my opinionating appears on the CBC.ca website. I am immensely attached to the CBC. You try living outside Toronto and trying to understand the country you live in without having the CBC on TV, on the radio or online. It can’t be done.
If Stephen Harper wins the next federal election, the CBC will be no more. The federal parks will close, Quebec will leave and we will get to the grocery store by horse and buggy. Drought, fire, pestilence etc. will rule the land. Most importantly, these columns will end. I will be in my office at home, writing on this website, drinking absinthe in bed and listening to old Bowie songs from the 1980s, “Cold Water’ by Damien Rice and at 2 a.m. the saddest song ever written, ‘Everything’ by Eric Carmen. Aren’t iPods great? You don’t have to be ambulatory with CDs in hand in order to suffer."
What exactly does Mallick mean by "living outside of Toronto" and trying to understand Canada without the CBC? Am I overreacting when I think that her attitude is absolutely ridiculous? Is she saying that you can understand Canada, without the CBC, only if you live in Toronto? Is Toronto the epicentre of Canada? The one place where everything in the country just comes together?
In Toronto, the NDP get plenty of seats, the Tories never win, and left-of-centre opinion is de rigueur.
According to the CBC, the NDP ought to win plenty of seats, the Tories ought to be shut out, and left-of-centre opinion is de rigueur.
I've lived outside of Toronto most of my life (I lived there for only six months). I've spent many years outside of Canada. I don't listen to CBC radio or watch CBC television. At all. When I lived in England, I watched CTV online, read the National Post and Globe and Mail online, and visited National Newswatch and Bourque every day. Now that I live in the U.S., I do the same.
Ms. Mallick has it exactly backwards. If you live in Toronto, or get all your news from the CBC, what you won't understand is Canada. Can Ms. Mallick explain to me why Albertans are the way they are? Can she tell me anything about British Columbia outside of Vancouver? Does she know why the 905 ring outside of Toronto is so different from the 416 centre? Can she explain the maritimes without citing Anne of Green Gables? Does she know why private health care is blossoming in Quebec, and why Quebec is the heart of the most aggressive pro-liberty contingent in Canada? (Don't believe me? Let me cite my partial evidence: Pierre Lemieux, Jacques Chaoulli, Le Quebecois Libre--whose banner ads we proudly display on our website--Andre Arthur, CHOI-FM, the Montreal Economic Institute, etc.)
Does she know why the Tories won a minority last time, and why they are a mere spitting distance of a majority this time around? No? Maybe she should try living outside of Toronto with the CBC off. Just for a little while. Who knows, Ms. Mallick, maybe you'll come to understand the other Canada. The one you really don't understand.
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The only reason the CONs got a minority was because of Adscam and a suspicious
'investigation' of Goodale.
Even with their 'in-and-out' election fraud, CONs could only eke out a smaller minority than Martin had in 2001.
Posted by: jo bleau | 2008-09-29 2:27:12 AM
Posted by: jo bleau | 2008-09-29 2:27:57 AM
Do you only watch the CBC and/or live in Toronto, jo bleau?
Posted by: P.M. Jaworski | 2008-09-29 2:30:07 AM
And people wonder why I hate Tronna so much.
Posted by: Zebulon Pike | 2008-09-29 5:18:36 AM
Ms. Mallick has it exactly backwards. If you live in Toronto, or get all your news from the CBC, what you won't understand is Canada. Can Ms. Mallick explain to me why Albertans are the way they are? Can she tell me anything about British Columbia outside of Vancouver?
Posted by: Ricky | 2008-09-29 5:57:41 AM
I have read very little of Mallick's writing, and the more I read the less I want to read any of it. The intro you quoted here is mind-bogglingly idiotic. I know she thinks she is trying to be funny, but it is hard to separate the failed humour from the merely crazy.
But my best attempt to apply the principle of charity tells me this: It is often traditionally said that the CBC (whether on radio or TV) is the only window to the nation available in the many small towns and villages and the most remote parts of Canada. As a public service, it broadcasts to places whether it is profitable or not. So perhaps when Mallick says "outside Toronto" she is trying to refer cleverly to the more remote areas of Canada. That there are many places outside Toronto that are neither small nor remote and that in the modern age of communication even the small and remote places have a lot more sources of information than a single weak CBC radio signal shows she's wrong about the degree of importance of the CBC.
I always feel a bit unclean when applying the principle of charity to a nut job, especially when the truth is there is no telling what the hell she really means with anything she has written (it really is all drivel). But I think it's possible that this is what she might have meant.
Posted by: Fact Check | 2008-09-29 7:25:29 AM
I believe she was using the literary method of "hyperbole" where as us on the right would use sarcasm... I know...
I'm a conservative, actually I hedge towards libertarian. But I don't hate national parks. I'm a hunter and a big proponent of conservation, and part of that is parks and part of it is hunting. I also quite enjoy CBC radio, I on the other hand LOATH the TV station and the website. I find CBC radio to be creative fresh and alternative where as I find the website and TV to be more of the same leftist media I get all the time. Funded of course by my tax dollars, constantly running news bashing my opinion and my religion and my values. Screw the CBC, the radio isn't that good.
But has anyone seen a Conservative platform that's said anything about trashing the CBC as a whole?
Horse and Buggy WTF?
Posted by: Pete | 2008-09-29 7:46:58 AM
Pull the plug on this national embarrassment now.
Posted by: deepblue | 2008-09-29 8:09:11 AM
Her father was almost fanatical about moose hunting. I guess she wasn't a chip off the old block.
Posted by: dp | 2008-09-29 8:17:56 AM
That someone from Toronto would say such things is not surprising. What is disgusting is that so many from Toronto believe her like it was gospel. Tragic. For all their alleged superiority they succumb to mere flattery with extraordinary ease. It is going to be fun to watch them destroy themselves. Make it slow and painful.
Posted by: Zebulon Pike | 2008-09-29 9:29:09 AM
Everyone seems to be overlooking the most vital and exciting statement in her post:
"If Stephen Harper wins the next federal election...Most importantly, these columns will end."
Can we hold her to that promise?
Posted by: Researcher | 2008-09-29 9:33:52 AM
I'm with "Researcher". Can we be gauranteed her columns will cease?
Posted by: Mike Currie | 2008-09-29 10:01:35 AM
The right word to describe this woman's attitude is -- arrogance. She shows not an ounce of humility.
Posted by: Ricky Martin | 2008-09-29 10:06:08 AM
So long as there is a Toronto, Mallick will have an audience. I say get rid of Toronto.
Posted by: Zebulon Pike | 2008-09-29 10:31:58 AM
The institution that employs her has an unaccountable and impenetrable internal culture that expects and demands leftist and typically hate-filled drivel. She is simply an overachiever.
The CBC should be sold-off as hardware and real estate to prevent a potential or partially intact toxic culture from infecting another broadcaster. The MSM broadcasters are probably all on their way to eventual extinction since the advent of cable, satellite and broadband. Ironically, a privatized CBC Sports could possibly be financially independent on cable or satellite. Their sports division is exceptional.
Posted by: John Chittick | 2008-09-29 11:16:53 AM
As a "half breed" (mother Canadian, father USA), I would like to encourage more of the type of rantings that Heather Mallick is famous (infamous?) for.
Every time she opens her mouth, McCain-Palin gain another half point in the polls as Americans react in disgust to her (and like-minded columnists) remarks.
If you good folks decide to elect a conservative government in your next election and Heather decides to leave Canada, I ask only one tiny favor: don't send her to the USA!!!!
Posted by: HalfAndHalf | 2008-09-29 4:59:42 PM
Their sports division is exceptional.
Posted by: John Chittick | 29-Sep-08 11:16:53 AM
Are you joking?!
In 1990 one of my athletes went to the Canada Games in Summerside on the Alberta boxing team. His fight, in the semi-finals, was scheduled to be televised, and we were glued to the TV for hours, waiting. The CBC coverage was trying to focus on the effect of the event on the local residents. When the bell rang, the camera began panning the crowd, and talking about what a great job the janitors were doing with so many young athletes in the building. They zoomed in on the faces of the team coaches (who were ugly as hell) and discussed their feelings about amateur sport. By the third round, I thought we'd get at least a short clip of the event, but no. They switched to a different camera that was interviewing a volunteer in the outer hallway.
The CBC is hopeless with anything other than hockey. In case nobody noticed, they're slipping in that department as well.
Posted by: dp | 2008-09-29 5:17:02 PM
I hope that Mallick gets fired and has to go to the US to search for work. Then her opinions will come back to haunt her. Oh, the irony!
Posted by: Zebulon Pike | 2008-09-29 6:18:26 PM
May a redneck American make a comment on Mallick's column? This was the last "straw" for me. I have fished in Canada every summer for the past 13 years. During that time I have witnessed plenty of USA bashing of our people and our leaders by Canadians, but assumed that most Canadians surely didn't feel that way. I now realize I was wrong. Canada will NEVER see my money again. I will never buy another product manufactured or even partially assembled in Canada. When I meet a Canadian here in the US,I will make a point of giving them a piece of my mind. I have had it with you people.
Posted by: MJZ | 2008-09-29 7:23:33 PM
MJZ: you are always welcome here. Go ahead and boycott Canada - it's the only way to get their attention. Yes they bash the US mercilessly, but it only masks their absolute dependence on US trade for their daily bread. That's why no one takes Canada seriously - why should they when they act that way. I was in Toronto on 9/11 - those not cheering were more concerned for delays at the border for their products. For shame. Total lack of priorities beyond greed. I thank God that I am Albertan and have confidence in my place in the world. God Bless America, and may God damn Canada.
Posted by: Zebulon Pike | 2008-09-29 7:31:04 PM
No one in Toronto cheered. In fact, storefronts posted American flags in their windows, in violation of the law (and good for them).
I went to Ottawa for the special tribute to the U.S. after 9/11. More Canadians had come to Ottawa for that day than for any Canada Day in history.
Posted by: P.M. Jaworski | 2008-09-29 7:46:22 PM
Yeah they were. Maybe not like the Palestinians, but the general sentiment supported the attacks as justifiable. Disgusting.
Posted by: Zebulon Pike | 2008-09-29 8:02:43 PM
No. They weren't. You're lying, and you know it.
My sister lived in Toronto at the time, and she recounted to me exactly what happened on the streets of Toronto following 9/11.
People were spontaneously singing the U.S. national anthem.
The only thing that is disgusting here is your despicable attempt to smear Torontonians. Sometimes, I think it's funny. But not in this case, and not on this issue.
Know where to draw the line.
Posted by: P.M. Jaworski | 2008-09-29 8:08:52 PM
I know what I saw. One Toronto person actually enjoyed seeing the Pentagon attacked. How fortunate that Toronto's reputation for tolerance and openness is a hideous lie.
Posted by: Zebulon Pike | 2008-09-29 8:13:46 PM
I don't know about Toronto, but I can confirm that some political science students in my stats class at the University of Waterloo were basically celebrating 9/11. Their attitude? That the attacks served the U.S. right for their "arrogance."
That was very shortly after 9/11, maybe the next day. I have to say, it kind of cemented my distaste for all things Canadian. And I do believe that the attitude expressed is/was simply the culmination of the more familiar anti-American sentiments we see all the time.
The bozos in my class just took anti-Americanism (an essential component of Canada's national identity) to its logical extreme.
Sometimes, I kind of wish I'd punched one of them in the face.
Posted by: Terrence Watson | 2008-09-29 8:19:12 PM
In other words, I think Zeb's story has some prima facie validity. I can easily believe it.
If folks were acting like that in Waterloo, it's not a stretch to think they would be acting like that in Toronto.
Posted by: Terrence Watson | 2008-09-29 8:21:34 PM
I wouldn't generalize it to all people in Waterloo. It was my 2nd day of university when it happened and I didn't see any of what Terrence was talking about.
Posted by: Ken | 2008-09-29 8:25:49 PM
I have to say, it kind of cemented my distaste for all things Canadian.
Posted by: Terrence Watson | 29-Sep-08 8:19:12 PM
All things Canadian? What a wanker.
Posted by: The Stig | 2008-09-29 8:33:42 PM
Zeb: Thanks for your kind words. I am not ready to damn Canada. I know there are many good Canadians, but this crap of bashing the USA by all the countries of this world gets tiring. We spend billions of dollars every year in aid to other countries, free the oppressed, and get crapped on for our efforts. We are not perfect by any measure, but don't deserve this abuse, especially by something so stupid as Mallick's opinions.
Thanks Canada for allowing me to vent...
Posted by: MJZ | 2008-09-29 8:54:46 PM
God Bless America, and may God damn Canada.
Posted by: Zebulon Punk | 29-Sep-08 7:31:04 PM
Bwahahahahahahaha. Another fucking wanker.
Posted by: The Stig | 2008-09-29 8:55:07 PM
Actually God blessed Canada by putting it next to the US. The problem is that the Canadians don't realize how good they have it. They're the "wankers". I love Americans because they are comfortable and content with who they are. Canadians - at least Ontarians - are insecure, depraved and indifferent to others because they don't care about anyone but themselves. Hopefully someday they'll realize their position and be grateful. I'm not optimistic.
Posted by: Zebulon Pike | 2008-09-29 9:06:03 PM
I am not ready to damn Canada.
Posted by: MJZ | 29-Sep-08 8:54:46 PM
I now realize I was wrong. Canada will NEVER see my money again. I will never buy another product manufactured or even partially assembled in Canada.
Posted by: MJZ | 29-Sep-08 7:23:33 PM
Sure looks to me like your damning Canada, or you have a very short memory. If I was you I'd check my bank account first thing tomorrow morning. With the US banking fiasco you may not have any money anyways. Have a nice day.
Posted by: The Stig | 2008-09-29 9:07:47 PM
Please allow me to revise and ammend my comments:
God Damn Canada
Posted by: MJZ | 2008-09-29 9:15:12 PM
I love Americans because they are comfortable and content with who they are.
Posted by: Zebulon Punk | 29-Sep-08 9:06:03 PM
You love Americans because you have an inferiority complex. You're the guy with a small dick that likes to hang around with John Holmes, only to find later on he's impotent.
Posted by: The Stig | 2008-09-29 9:15:40 PM
God Damn Canada
Posted by: MJZ | 29-Sep-08 9:15:12 PM
Posted by: The Stig | 2008-09-29 9:17:22 PM
MJZ: don't mind Stig, he's just Canadian.
Posted by: Zebulon Pike | 2008-09-29 9:25:47 PM
Someone like Stig doesn't bother me. He really is quite "child like" isn't he?
Posted by: MJZ | 2008-09-29 9:34:22 PM
MJZ: yes he is. Like I said, he is Canadian.
Posted by: Zebulon Pike | 2008-09-29 9:36:37 PM
God Damn Canada
Posted by: MJZ | 29-Sep-08 9:15:12 PM
Come back in 6 weeks when you've elected B. Hussein Obama president and you'll see me have have a really good laugh. You'll be a citizen of the Islamic Republic of America.
Who will be in Obama's cabinet? Al Sharpton? Louis Farrakan? OJ Simpson? Kwame Kilpatrick?
Posted by: The Stig | 2008-09-30 11:07:08 AM
IMHO Heather Mallick represents, and is a part of, the uber-people that run the CBC and live in Toronto. Her rants are not satire. In her article on Sarah Palin, she uses her anti-American hatred, feminism and profanity to further her and her coddled friends more taxpayer money to be able to swill more chardonnay and munch brie with her other equally enlightened...and irrelevant friends.
She and her vocal supporters are the wankers...not Canada.
I was born in Toronto. I live 2 hours west of there now. And, I will be voting conservative after many years of liberal.
I work many hours running my small biz, pay heavy taxes...so that we can have someone not in control of their hormones or common sense create "satire" on my nickel. The CBC is full of them...so is Toronto. I would support the CBC if they had the ante-Mallick...they don't and never will.
Don't judge all Canadians by these two equally arrogant entities.
Posted by: mike from Canada | 2008-09-30 12:50:53 PM
Ms. Mallick has apparently no idea what was she talking about. I've been living here in Toronto for almost my whole lifetime and seriously, I don't need CBC to become wise. I also work here as a realtor and people hire me from all over the Canada, not only ihabitants living in the nearest vicinity. And I swear that even foreigners from abroad know at least a minimum about what's going on here (mostly it's the main reason why they choose our country as the final destination). I mean no offense, but Ms. Mallick's comment is just a pure prejudice and lack of information.
Posted by: realtor in Toronto | 2008-10-09 10:20:13 AM
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