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Wednesday, December 28, 2005

Happy F&%^*%@ Hanukkah from the AP and the CBC!

This AP story appears entirely fixated on the image of fat, comfortable Jews stuffing their faces during Hanukkah. Yes, that's right. When they're not occupying the land of peace-loving, slim -- because they're all poor -- Palestinians, and controlling international finance, they're sitting on their backsides and filling their faces with fried stuff. Even more telling, when the CBC website reprinted the story, this was their headline:

Israelis begin Hanukkah festival with warning against overeating

Hey, don't rain on their parade, or anything. We wouldn't want to just let them enjoy their holiday. The AP headline was, simply,

Israelis Begin 8-Day Festival of Hanukkah

They waited till the actual body of the story to darken any Israeli light. Check out this paragraph:

Many assume they'll gain some weight over the course of the festival, when children are off school, families get together and - in the rainy days of winter - there is little else to do than sit around and eat the pancakes and doughnuts.

How does this sound any different from Canadians at Christmas? Here is a partial list of what I have eaten over the past few days (so without sharing):
Entire tin of Planter's salted cashew nuts
Entire box of Ganong's chocolate covered cherries
Entire medium-sized bottle of Bailey's
Two French toast breakfasts
Several bottles of wine
Entire round of triple cream brie
At least two (large) bags of Miss Vickie's jalapeno chips
Two pieces of Sacher torte with whipped cream
Close to my body weight in fried eggplant and green beans with almond slivers (in an attempt to maintain some semblance of healthy eating)
And more and more and more.
And just in case the image of fat, greedy, lazy Israelis isn't enough, let us not forget that leader of theirs -- you know, the one that they keep electing, even though we all know he's mean and bad?:

The badly overweight Sharon, 77, was back at work Sunday a week after suffering a mild stroke. Doctors insisted that he must go on a diet, something they've been urging unsuccessfully since 1965. Estimates of the rotund, 170 centimetre Israeli leader's weight varied widely in Israeli media, from 117 to 142 kilograms.

Badly overweight. Rotund. Not that tall. 142 kilograms! Okay, we get it. He's so fat he had a stroke. He's so undisciplined (except when he's being mean to Palestinians) that for forty years he hasn't been able to lose weight. He's so arrogant he doesn't heed his doctors. He's so short and round and fat that when he sits around the Knesset, he sits around the Knesset! Take our prime minister, please! 
Happy F%^&*@% Hanukkah!
Cross-posted at Wonkitties.

Posted by wonkitties on December 28, 2005 | Permalink

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Comments

Please see post immediately below. There's nothing even remotely objectionable in that article.

Posted by: Chris Selley | 2005-12-28 12:28:15 PM

the

Posted by: Ort | 2005-12-28 9:50:34 PM


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